Not sure if you even need to change your thinking, think you are already a positive person? Try doing this for a week and then see if you could benefit from starting your own positive thinking journey.
One way of finding out how much negativity is floating around in your mind is to listen to what you say… how much is negative; how much is positive? Now listen to what you talk about, the language you use (positive or negative words – Such as, if someone asked you how you are, would you reply, ‘I’m good,’ ‘I’m okay,’ or ‘not bad’. Using two negative words to make a positive is keeping the answer at the bottom of the positivity scale. So not quite negative but not really a positive either. Do you talk about dreams and ideas, or do you talk about other people, judging their decisions? Do you find yourself complaining about anything and everything?
Listening to who and what you talk about and the manner in which you do it will tell you a lot about how negative you really are – most people are surprised to discover just how much negativity is in them.
· Discovering where your negative thoughts began, who helped put them there.
· Why you talk to yourself so badly.
· Why you believe that you are not capable of living any other life than the one you are currently living.
Telling your self to think positive without making these discoveries about yourself - processing it then letting the negative thoughts go will send you on an endless treadmill of positive affirmations with no real progress. And it because people do this that they say it doesn’t work and they give up and put it down.
Depending on the depth of your negativing thoughts and how long they have been there, you may need some help to identify them and / or to release them from your mind. There are plenty of self-help books (see list below) out there to assist you and never rule out a therapy session or five, they can be invaluable for helping you to identity, work through and finally dispose of certain large, overpowering negative thoughts that have been rooted there for a long time.
N.B You may well discover that certain family members have been instrumental in planting some or all of your negative thoughts, particularly those that have led to you believing that you aren’t good enough. Remember – and this is SO important – that blaming them, building resentment about their actions only serves to punish you more. The only reason we want/need to identify who it was is to confirm to ourselves that it is not our own thought. Once we know who it belongs to, we can let it go easier. We don’t even need to give it back to them, they already have enough negativity going on behind the scenes for them to have given it to you in the first place. Only hurt people hurt people.
Whilst you are on the way to work your way through discovering and letting go the negativity holding you back, you can start getting on the positivity trail.
Positive affirmations are a great way to get going so are positive quotes. I know of so many positive people who began their journey by scrolling through social media and finding a quote that resonated with them. Printing it off or copying it out and placing it in a spot they will see it every day such as:
· Bathroom mirror
· Fridge door
· Screen saver on your laptop, computer, tablet, phone
· Inside pantry door
· Toilet door
Anywhere you will see it regularly, the bathroom mirror was my favourite and still is. Ooh and screen savers. It was because I found them so inspiring, you know where you are and what you need to work on based on what ones are resonating with you at any given time, that I began my Instagram page.
They helped me when I was at my lowest, and they still help and support me now.
Positive self-help books, Blogs, You Tube videos, TED Talks… there is so much support for anyone beginning or continuing their Positive Thinking Journey.
Cut yourself some slack and do not get caught up in the toxic positive messages. Such as you have to be happy all the time. No, you don’t. that is not what a positive thinker does at all.
A positive thinker still has bad days, bad things still happen. They don’t just put on a happy face and pretend that all is well in the world. But they are much better equipped to deal with the negative things and challenges that life brings with it sometimes.
There is plenty of help, support and ideas to get you on your way available on my website www.positivethinkingforbeginners.com
Whether you want positive affirmations, easy ways to start meditation, a beginners guide to de-cluttering, how gratitude can help you be more positive, daily exercises to get you out of your comfort zone and even how Harry Potter can help you on your quest to become a positive thinker are all found here along with much more. Oh... and don't forget to check out the free down loadable word searches on the fun stuff tab or to order a copy of my book Positive Thinking for Beginners
Remember, you are better than you think you are xx